Happiness is...

I woke up in a pretty good mood this morning. I'm not sure why. Yesterday wasn't the greatest of days. Maybe it was the wedding I went to on Sunday. My cousin got married in her backyard, and the moment she started down the "aisle" it started to rain. Regardless, she and the groom were so happy to be getting married they had smiles on their faces. They rushed the ceremony because they were the only ones under a tarp and the rest of us were getting soaked, but they were in such good spirits that my heart filled with happiness. I'm really happy for her. And it did my heart good to see that love like that can exist in this world and not just in books.

Anyway, I don't have much time -- or much patience, for that matter. I've got a cat attacking my fingers and chewing on my ring as I type. So this post is going to be quick. I just wanted to capture my good mood by listing a few things that make me happy.

1. A real, live copy of MY book!

2. Jewel (particularly at the moment, Ten by Jewel)

3. Friends reruns

4. Driving (turns out I really like to drive -- who would've guessed it?)
5. The feeling of a nice pen across a sheet of paper.
6. My dog

7. My cat

8. Audrey Hepburn movies

9. The beach. Or any body of water in general.

10. Flowers from Dana for finishing yet another draft of my book

My Writing Vacation

I am a horrible, horrible blogger.

To be honest, I've been a horrible, horrible writer too.

You remember when I said I was taking a break from my current WiP to work on an old one? Well, it somehow morphed into a plain ole break. I haven't picked up a pen or opened a word document in about a week. For the first few days, I enjoyed the living heck outta it. But now...I kind of miss it. The adrenaline, the frustration, the whole damn process.

I got a confirmation email last Wednesday for my Createspace copy. It's not gonna be perfect. In fact, it's gonna be a downright disaster. No title page, chapters starting on the right AND left sides, the cover not exactly what I had in mind. Oh, not to mention the same scene in Chapters 12 AND 14. BUT! It's mine. A real live copy of something I slaved over for months. So, even if it isn't perfect, I'm just super-excited to hold it in my hands, ya know?

I have been addicted to Sara Bareilles' new song lately.


It's catchy and fun and I sing it all day at work. Much better than having Adam Lambert stuck in my head, let me tell you.

I've been doing some driving lately. A friend of mine took it upon herself to teach me and so once a week, she picks me up and lets me drive around town. Last week, it was just the back country roads while I got comfortable behind the wheel. Yesterday, I drove the busier streets. And I didn't run over any pedestrians or back-end someone or have a panic attack! Next time, we'll probably try the busiest street -- which just so happens to be the street I work on. It's my biggest driving fear. Well, that and the highway. But gradually, I'm conquering these fears. Couldn't be prouder of myself. Isn't it silly that driving has scared me so much?

I finally got to go to the beach yesterday. I love to swim. LOVE to swim. But I rarely get to do it. We've been in the middle of a heat wave 'round here, but I've been stuck at work all day. Wouldn't it figure that my day off is when the heat breaks? It was still plenty warm enough to swim, though I'm sure I would have appreciated it more when the weather was nearing a hundred degrees. Still felt amazing to dive into that cool water. If I could, I'd swim every single day of my life. I think I was a fish in another life.



I have to get ready for work (I hate Saturdays!), but I'll leave you guys with a couple links I thought were super helpful. Well, they would have been if I was actually WRITING right now. Ah well, soon.

201 Ways to Arouse Your Creativity
10 Writing Tips That Can Help Almost Anyone, courtesy of Janet Fitch

I'm hoping to get back to something resembling a blogging routine soon. Wanderlust Wednesdays, book reviews, progress updates. I've got my fingers crossed! In the meantime, Happy Saturday, everyone!

Thanks, NaNoWriMo!

I've been basking in the glow of a completed revision for the last couple days. I know I'm not finished. There are still some things that need to be fixed. But I feel like a thousand pound weight has been lifted off my shoulders. And it feels GREAT!


(Okay, so this isn't me. But Audrey's smile is exactly how I feel, plus she's just so cute!)

I ordered my free proof copy from Createspace. The cover isn't exactly what I wanted and I rushed the blurb on the back and the About the Author section, but it'll still be pretty darn cool to hold that book in my hands.

I've decided to get back to work on a previous WiP and let this one simmer for a while. At least a couple weeks. If I read that book one more time, I think I'll explode. Either that or I'll do something drastic and delete the files. And that would be bad. Really bad.

One of the good things about this project is that it taught me a lot about my writing process. I always thought I was the type to write a chapter, revise it and go on to the next chapter. Turns out, I work much better just writing straight through and THEN revising. It's one hell of a task, turning off that inner editor. But totally worth it. Before, I would get so caught up in perfecting each scene in each chapter that I'd only make it about five chapters in before I gave up (now that I think about it, this may be why I have a few gray hairs...)

I really think I have NaNoWriMo to thank for this lesson. If I hadn't decided to take part in the craziness, who knows how long I would have struggled to finish a project? I'm excited to get back to work on my old WiP using my new process. I think it'll do wonders. So, thank you, NaNo!



I've been thinking a lot about the world of self-publishing. Do any of you do it? If so, how do you like it? Is it better to go the conventional route and query agents and all that jazz? Any thoughts would be much appreciated!

Phase Three -- Complete

Whew!

I finished my third rewrite last night. I use the word "finished" very loosely because,I rushed through the last few chapters so I would meet my June 30th deadline. But I think I've got everything where it needs to go now. It's just a matter of tightening and cleaning up the writing. Which should take about, oh another six months.

God, I really hope not!

I was looking to procrastinate the other day and I pulled out one of my old manuscripts. And then I was overcome with the need to get back to it. To reacquaint myself with those characters and finish their stories. I miss them. Is that strange? To miss a fictional character that only lives inside your head? Maybe that's why people think writers are crazy, huh?



I've been trying to decide whether or not to continue with my current WiP, cleaning it up and making it shine, or to dig back into this other one. I'm sure distance would be helpful. After all, I never did take some time away from it. As soon as I typed The End, I dove right into the edits.

So, what do you think? Does it really help to get some distance from a piece of writing before ripping it apart? Should I start something new and let this one simmer for a little while?


In non-writerly news, I took part in the ridiculousness that is the Twilight phenomenon on Tuesday night. A bunch of us went to the opening show at midnight. The place was packed to the ceiling with squealing teenage girls and soccer moms wearing Team Edward or Team Jacob t-shirts. I'm not a rabid Twi-hard (that's what they're called, right?) by any means. In fact, I'm downright cynical and will always be the first to make fun of all of it. A friend of mine force-fed me the books last year and I have to say, I prefer the movies. At least they're not filled with a thousand different descriptions of Edward's beauty, you know?

Oh, and if anyone is wondering -- I'm totally Team Jacob.

Busy Bee

Today, I'm on a high. I was a real busy buy in the hours between 10am and 5pm. I went down to Secretary of State and got my permit (again). The goal is to have my license by the end of the summer. I just turned 27, for God's sake! I should have my license! After that, I was walking past a store. They had a Now Hiring sign in their window, and I decided to apply. I've been meaning to find a 2nd job anyway. Well, when I turned in the application, I got an interview right then. I have a follow-up in the morning. Hopefully, I'll get it! I wandered around the mall for a while afterward, then stopped in at Barnes and Noble. There, I finished up Chapter 9 and got about half through Chapter 10. When my laptop's battery died, I left the book store, planning on going to a coffee shop down the street, where I could plug in. As I walked down the sidewalk, a library sign caught my eye.

I've always wondered where this mysterious library was, but I never actually LOOKED for it. Well, today I did. And I found it. I spent the next three hours alternately browsing the shelves and working on my own novel. I checked out three books (April & Oliver, 20 Times a Lady, and What I Did for Love). I know -- I haven't even made it through my To Read list for this year. But I couldn't resist. I haven't been to a library since I moved to Lansing over 2 years ago. It was like trick or treating!

I also finished Chapter 10's revisions and got about half through 11. I'm making pretty quick progress. I mean, my deadline is Wednesday before midnight and I still have about 6 chapters to go. But at this point, it's really just putting the pieces where they go and cleaning up the writing. By this time Thursday, I should have a cohesive, semi-readable third draft! And, frankly, I can't wait.

PS. In case anyone was wondering, the lie in the Awardy Goodness post was number 6. I DO like purses quite a bit, but I only have about 15 or so, and they definitely don't have names!

Revisions and a Birthday

So, yesterday was my birthday. I have this thing about birthdays -- I don't like them. I don't like getting older. I would be content to stay the same age forever.

I suppose it's not so bad. Most people think I'm younger anyway. But in my mind...dude, I'm getting OLD!!

Regardless, have a yummy cyber cupcake!



My day was nice, though. Had dinner with a friend and went to the casino, where I didn't win at all. What I didn't do was work on my revisions.

I'm on Chapter 6 now. And Chapter 6 is going to require another overhaul. I swear, I wrote this book all out of order. And it's driving me CRAZY!! I don't know how many chapters I have. There were 17 in the original, but I had two chapter 5's and two chapter 13's. And I immediately cut the first two chapters when I started and another a couple days ago. And I'm sure there will be more cuts and that I'll combine some things. This is the messiest rewrite I've ever had, but the results are dramatically better. And so I push on...

Chock-Full of Awardy Goodness

Okay, so my brain is mostly mush these days on account of all the editing I've been doing. Actually, Chapter 5 required an entire rewrite so...yeah. That was fun.

Today's post is a kind of cop-out. BUT! It's chock-full of awardy goodness!

Okay, okay. So I didn't technically receive these awards. But they were passed on to anyone who hadn't received them yet soooo...that's me!*

*Side note: Forgive my squirreliness. I'm a little keyed up because I'm off for five days after work today and my birthday is on Tuesday. Not to mention I just had cookies for breakfast.

First up is the Creative Writer Blogger Award. I yanked this award from Cherie Reich For this award, I'm supposed to nominate 7 other bloggers, but I also have to tell you 7 things about myself. Either 6 outrageous truths and 1 outrageous lie or 1 outrageous truth and 6 outrageous lies. I'm gonna tell you 6 truths and a lie and leave you to figure out which is the lie.



1. I was a late bloomer. I didn't even have my first kiss till I was about 22.
2. When I was 11, I formed a girl-group with my 2 best friends. We were sure we were gonna be huge stars!
3. I love Jim Carrey. In fact, my dog is named after one of his characters -- Ace Ventura.
4. I'm addicted to music. My computer's hard drive groans under the weight of all the mp3s it holds.
5. To this day, I swear that I'm haunted and that there's a ghost that follows me wherever I move to.
6. I have an unhealthy addiction to purses -- I own over a hundred and they all have names.
7. I hate shoes and will avoid wearing them at any cost.

There ya have it. Can you guess which one is the lie?

The next award is the Live is Good Award, courtesy of Jaydee Morgan With this one, I get to answer a few questions -- I promise to answer truthfully!



1. What's your favorite genre to read? Ever since I was about 12 or 13 I've been addicted to romance. I started off with Harlequins and now I devour anything romantic. It's also what I write.

2. If you couldn't write in the genre you do, what genre would you write in? I have always had this secret desire to write a murder mystery kind of thing.

3. Pepsi or Coke? I used to HATE Pepsi. Now, I love it. Coke is too bubbly for me!

4. How do you spend your Sundays? On the Sundays I don't work, I usually spend them hanging around the house, catching up on chores and reading and writing. Oh, and I ALWAYS read Postsecret.


5. Penguin or giraffe? I can't choose!

6. What type of vehicle do you drive? I actually don't have my driver's license yet. I know, I know! I'll be 27 on Tuesday and I don't have my driver's license! I'm a freak!

7. Would you lick a battery if your life depended on it? I'd do a lot of things if my life depended on it.

8. When do you like to write - in the morning, the afternoon, or the evening? I used to think I was a night writer, but I have recently discovered I get a lot more done in the morning.

9. Which do you like more - Facebook or Twitter? I just recently jumped on the Facebook wagon but I like it more than Twitter -- although it is fun to follow celebs!

10. If you get hurt (like a scrape on the knee or break your arm), do you ask for a band-aid? I hardly think a band-aid would help a broken arm, but if I've scraped my knee or cut my finger on something yet again (which ALWAYS happens) I definitely whine for a band-aid.

And the last award is, again, from Jaydee. It's the Versatile Blogger Award, which -- again -- requires me to tell you a few things about myself. Let's see if I can do this without ruining the truth or lie list above!



1.I love LeAnn Rimes. Not really sure why, but I have been a fan since I was 13.
2. Gilmore Girls is my version of happy pills. When I'm sad or upset, I just pop in a dvd and I'm good to go.
3. I hate hats and will burn my work hat the day I quit (or get fired!).
4. Other than writing, I haven't the faintest idea what I want to do with my life. At all.
5. I love the water. If I could, I would live on the beach all spring, summer and fall.
6. I've been keeping a journal since I was 10. I've got a box full of them in my closet. I'll probably never read them. Who wants to read about their adolescent crushes and teenage angst?
7. I love the way my toes look all painted and pretty but I can't ever be bothered getting them done.

And there we have it. I'm gonna take a cue from the Jaydee and Cherie and toss these awards to anyone who hasn't gotten them yet!

And now I must go back to the trenches. Chapter 6 isn't gonna fix itself!

Sunburn, Revisions and Chely Wright

I'm still plodding through my revisions. The progress has slowed some. I was averaging a chapter a day, handwritten revisions and typing in the changes. That lasted for three chapters. Now, I'm dealing with the mess that used to be Chapter 6 and is now Chapter 4. Chapter 6 is where I ripped a scene from to put in Chapter 1. Now, I'm left with a bunch of nonsensical crap to figure out. I'm about half done with it. And I don't want to keep going.

I think part of the reason why is because I look like this:


And feel like this:


Sunburns are not fun. I have been kicking myself ever since Saturday for forgetting my sun block. I have fair skin. I burn easily. I know this. WHAT was I thinking? It's impossible to concentrate when your skin is on fire, ya know?

It was a fun day, though, sunburn and all. I got to meet Chely Wright and she was an absolute doll. The sweetest celebrity I've had the pleasure to meet. She signed her book for me, told me I had a cool name and that she liked my shirt. She also signed a copy of her newest CD for Dana's mom, who ADORES Chely. It was a pretty awesome day.


(a picture from Chely's performance on Saturday)

Ever since then, I've been struggling to get my head back into my story. Chapter 4 is NOT pretty, people. In fact, it's downright homely. BUT! I'm going to finish whipping it into shape today. On to Chapter 5 tomorrow.

Only about ten more chapters to go...

Maybe It's the Sugar

I am so restless today.

I've been up since 7:30 this morning and so far I have vacuumed AND steam cleaned the carpets and couch, swept and mopped the kitchen, loaded and unloaded the dishwasher, cleaned the litter boxes, walked the dog and washed and dried a load of laundry (which still hasn't been put away -- I HATE putting laundry away!) Guess what I haven't done today.

That's right.

I haven't worked on my novel.

Oh, I pulled the newly revamped Chapter One out, read it aloud and made adjustments. But as far as Chapter Two goes? I've barely looked at it. Each time I sit down to work, I can't sit still. I get up, wander around the house, move all my stuff to a new spot.

I started out in the chair:


And then moved to the table:


Where I had company:
(Our kitties, Brian and Lady)


And then the couch:


And I just can't sit still. Today should have been a productive day. I've had an entire day to myself, plenty of quality time with my thoughts. A printed out manuscript to work on (which no longer matches what I've got on my computer, thanks to the revisions I've already done) and tons of colored pens and sticky notes. This should be fun. So why am I so darn restless?

Does anyone else ever have this problem? Any suggestions on how to solve it? It's driving me INSANE!!!

Someone's Getting a Facelift

I am currently elbow-deep in my second round of revisions. After my first run through the entire novel, I had a list of things I either didn't like or just didn't work. A list two pages long.



Among the changes I am making this round:

* I deleted the first 7,000 words. SEVEN. THOUSAND. It physically hurt to hit the Delete key.

* I'm moving a scene from Chapter 6 to Chapter 1 and reworking the entire first chapter to introduce the main players and maybe strengthen my main character.

* I'm taking an entire family of characters out. My main character had too many brothers, so I gave the eldest the ax -- along with his wife and two kids.

So, lots of huge changes really early in the revision process. I'm starting to wish I'd taken a month away from this novel before diving right into revisions. Distance is something I could certainly use. Especially with deleting those characters. I was kind of attached to Mari's sister-in-law!

I'm also considering a name change. I'm not sure I'm loving Mari's name. I've already changed her name once (she was originally Izzy). Also, Mari comes off to me as a really weak main character. She definitely needs some work!

It's an overwhelming process. But splitting it into stages is definitely making it less daunting. I don't think I'm going to write any Wanderlust posts until next month -- I know, I know, you're all devastated! I really enjoy writing them, but I want to focus on getting this book into shape by the end of the month. The entire project needs a facelift!

By the way, thank you to everyone who commented on my last entry! The tips and words of encouragement were really helpful!

Digging In

It’s coming up on a week since I wrapped up The Never-Ending Novel. The adrenaline high has slowly given way to a mild case of panic. The road ahead of me is a rocky, twisty, turny one. And a long one at that.



I am currently most of the way through my first reading of the whole thing since I wrapped it up last week. And I am here to tell you – this book? Complete and utter crap! Like loads and loads of crap. I’m sure there’s a halfway decent book in there somewhere. It’s just going to take a LOT of work to uncover it.

I haven’t quite come up with a method yet. I’ve completed a few first drafts since I started writing fiction (about five – none as long and involved as this one) and haven’t made it to the revision stage in most of them. I claim to love revision, but I definitely get cold feet when I realize just how much work is ahead of me. Revision is HARD!

I’m feeling a little overwhelmed here. I’ve got about 350 pages of crap to rewrite and organize and cut and flesh out. I’ve got a thousand different continuity issues to track down and fix. I’ve got bad dialogue and wishy washy characters to fix. Unresolved plot lines. You name it, I’ve got it. AHHH!



I’ve started a list of things to fix my second run-through. But I know I’ve only scratched the surface. So here’s my question to all of you: Do you have any specific methods for revising? Anything you’ve found helpful? What doesn’t work? I’m a sponge here, willing to try anything!

Cue the Hallelujah Choir

So after nearly seven months of slaving over mediocre words and underdeveloped characters, hiding from scary scenes and pathetic prose...after months and months of telling myself I was no good, and I would never, ever finish this book, yesterday at about 1:27pm,

I

FINISHED

MY

FIRST

DRAFT

!!!!!!!

And this is how it felt:








And I found this picture in a google search for "freedom." I thought it was an interesting representation of the writing life. The chains represent the burning drive to write that we can't escape and the butterfly is the something beautiful that comes out of it.



I'm going to spend the rest of my day relaxing and reveling in the knowledge that all those torturous months paid off. Then, I'm going to do a quick run-through edit before I set it aside for a while. I have some continuity issues that Dana noticed when she read the first few chapters. Mari's best friend, for example, has four kids in one paragraph and three in the next. And then she's back to four three pages later. And Mari's relationship with her ex lasted somewhere between five and six years -- it seems to vary from page to page. Lots of work ahead of me. But I guess that's what happens when you write your first fifty thousand words in thirty days, huh?

I hope everyone has a marvelous Sunday -- I know I will!

On Hold

I've decided to put Wanderlust Wednesdays on hold until I finish this pesky first draft of mine. Maybe this is a dramatic statement, considering I've been about a chapter and a half away from finishing for the last two weeks. If all goes well (and it WILL, damn it!) I should be writing about my dream destinations by next Wednesday. In the meantime, I'm open for suggestions -- any place you would like me to write about?

So Close I Can Taste It

I have been a bad, bad blogger. I've thought about writing a new post, even started one or two, but everything I say just sounds like word vomit. Words for the sake of words. Boring, whiny, annoying. But I'm trying again!

I have to work today. Saturdays are the days Satan created, I'm telling you. I swear, the population of the general public drops about fifty points when Saturday arrives (side note: I said this to a co-worker last Saturday, and he said, "No, it's more than that -- it's more like THIRTY!" Point proven.) I'm not looking forward to work, but I have tomorrow off, so I'll be okay.

Oh, I should probably mention my progress on The Never-Ending Novel. I pushed past 100k last night. And...

I'm

Still

Not

DONE!

I knew this would happen! This thing refuses to end!

I just have to write a couple of scenes, though. Two or three leading up to The Birth and then The Birth. Which I'm still nervous about, but thanks to you lovely ladies, I'm not AS nervous as I was before. You guys rock, I ever tell you that?

I have every intention on finishing this thing up tomorrow. Wish me luck!

Also, E. Elle was sweet enough to give me an award last month (I know, I know -- last MONTH!). I'm passing it on today.

The rules:
1. Five recipients
2. Make up something about the people you give the award to. (Yep, this is the fun part!)
3. Link to the people who you give it to.
4. Link back to the original award post.





1. Erin at Apropos of Nothing, just quit her job as a glorified secretary to chase down her dream of becoming Jessica Simpson's Best Friend. CaCee, watch your back!
2. Jeanie at Genie of the Shell is hard at work on her fairy tale novel -- and her mission to prove that The Grimm Brothers were actually hired by a sexist, futuristic government to give women a bad name.
3. Write Chick at Spin Me Write Round actually thinks that Writer's Butt is a good thing!
4. Rebecca at Diary of a Virgin Novelist was driven insane by her current WiP and spent yesterday rolling around in the mud -- and attempted to drag us down with her! It's okay, Rebecca -- mud baths are supposed to be good for the skin!
5. Lauren at Embrace the Detour is a self-proclaimed loser and has, on more than one occasion, lost her mind. Her second home is a lovely padded room in LooneyBin Acres.

Thanks again, Elle! I hope I didn't offend any of the awesome ladies I passed the award on to!

Chapter 17, You Terrify Me

Okay, so I've been writing since 6:30 this morning. I'm training on new equipment for work today and I got here early -- this store doesn't have WiFi, so I figured I would have some prime writing time. I did find a public connection I must be picking up from the restaurant next door, but it keeps dropping and isn't strong enough to keep me good and distracted. So...I've been writing all morning.

I just passed the 97k mark. Mari is in her eighth month of pregnancy and things between her and Zander are getting more complicated by the word. My never-ending novel is about to reach its climax -- the birth of Mari's baby. I've never written anything like the birth of a child. I'd rather write steamy sex scenes all day long. But this isn't the kind of book I can fill cover to cover with sex (although that might be fun to write) so there is no getting out of this scene. I'm sure I'll manage alright. I've done lots and lots of reading and research. And I've got a couple friends who've had babies, so I can always pass it over to them for input. I'm just...nervous.

I'm psyching myself out. I know this scene means that I'm almost finished with my first draft, but I don't want to reach it. I'm afraid I'll keep writing filler to avoid the birth of this baby, which will only make revisions WAY harder! I only have two chapters left in my outline to write -- the next one is The One with the Birth. Maybe I could just write *insert baby being born here* and then continue on to the next chapter? But, no. That would be cowardly. If I'm going to forge my way through this first draft, I'm going to do it in its entirety. No skimping or skating here. I WILL write that birth scene, darn it!

Do you ever get nervous about a scene you have to write? Whether it's a birth scene, a sex scene or something else entirely? How do you get passed the nerves to write it? Do you just close your eyes and go, or do you meticulously plan out every syllable until you have such a strict guideline for the scene it's impossible to mess up?

Wanderlust Wednesday - Mackinac Island

Okay, so it's a little late, but I'm not about to flake again this week! As promised, I'm actually posting about another beautiful place. I had no idea where I was going to write about up till about an hour ago. It may seem lazy, but I've been thinking about how I could use a vacation and this is one of my favorite places. I figure, since I've never been it counts!


Mackinac Island, Michigan



Mackinac Island is a small island in Lake Huron, located between Michigan's Lower and Upper Peninsulas. The entire island is a National Historic Landmark and almost all motor vehicles are prohibited. The main modes of transportation are bicycles and horse-drawn carriages.



The restoration of historical elements gives the place a feeling of nostalgia, taking you back in time.





The water is so blue here it gives Santorini a run for its money.




Not to mention, it's home to some of the coolest rock formations.

Arch Rock:


The Devil's Kitchen:


Skull Cave:


And Sugar Loaf:


All in all, Mackinac Island is just the place to go if you're in the mood to travel back in time. It's an idyllic escape right here in the US. It's a place soaked in history, from Native American legends to wars between countries. Mackinac played a role in American history, even if it wasn't a major one.

I can't wait till I can take a vacation and witness all this history myself.

Review: The Dogs of Babel

Okay, so I know I haven't even written a review for Don't Look Down yet, and I will get to it, I swear. But I just finished The Dogs of Babel by Carolyn Parkhurst and I can't shake the feeling it gave me. My heart is aching, literally.

It's been a long time since I've read a book that stuck with me this way. I believe the last one was The Lovely Bones. I suppose they're similar in their subjects -- a loved one has died and left someone behind grieving for them. In this case, the grieving is Paul Iverson. His wife, Lexy Ransome, has passed away -- she fell from the apple tree in their backyard. Paul, heartbroken and desperate for answers to the various "clues" Lexy left around the house, decides to teach their dog, Lorelei, to talk. He hopes that maybe she can clear up what happened that day.

The book, as far-fetched and downright ludicrous as its premise sounds, reaches deep down into the souls of those who have lost someone they love, as well as anyone who has shared the bond between dog and human. Written in short bursts, we see how Paul and Lexy met and follow their courtship and marriage up to that tragic day. Lexy is an intriguing character, given to fits of anger or passion in any given moment. She is spontaneous and charming and confusing. I liked that we got to see Lexy alive and vibrant. These glimpses allowed us to feel the loss that Paul is experiencing even more acutely than if we'd only seen the present.

There are some passages about animal abuse, which brought tears to my eyes, but I think they were necessary to tell the story of Paul, Lexy and Lorelei. To see the lengths that Paul was almost willing to go to in order to teach Lorelei to speak and to know the truth about what happened that day -- was Lexy's fall an accident, or did she commit suicide?

This book is tragic and funny and bittersweet and intriguing. I couldn't put it down and once I read those final pages, I closed it with a sigh, left with an ache that will last for a long, long time.

The Dogs of Babel is definitely a worthwhile read. Parkhurst writes beautifully and honestly about love and loss and desperation. This is the kind of book I want to absorb straight into my veins in the hope that I will write half as well.

A Mother's Day Tribute

One day, when I was about eleven or twelve, I asked my mom what she wanted to be when she grew up. She looked at me with a sad little half-smile and said, "My mom never told me I could be anything I wanted to be. So...I didn't have a dream."

To this day, my heart breaks when I remember this. From the moment I could talk, and I'm sure way before that, my mom told me I could be whatever I wanted to be. That the world was mine for the taking. Dream big, she'd say. Dream big and reach for the stars.

And I always have. From the time I was eight years old and wanted to be a veterinarian to when I was thirteen and wanted to be a superstar singer. Even now, I dream of publication and my books in the hands of people everywhere.

I still dream.

I try to imagine sometimes what it would have been like growing up with a mom who never told me to dream. Who never said I could be anything I wanted to be. It's a sad thought. I wouldn't be who I am now without my mother's words of encouragement. I wouldn't be who I am now without her love and acceptance.

A few years ago, I came out to my mom. I was twenty-two and even I was surprised by this revelation. Scared to death, I told her, terrified that she would disown me. But she just smiled and opened her arms, hugged me and said she'd always love me, no matter what. I know I'm lucky to have a mom like that. Someone so accepting, in spite of her Christian upbringing and pastor sister and Bible-thumping mother. I thank God that she is so accepting of Dana and loves her as if she were her own daughter.

My mother is an amazing woman who has persevered through so much. This Mother's Day, I am even more thankful to have her. Last year, we almost lost her to a heart condition we didn't know she had. But, stubborn woman that she is, she came out if it strong and positive. And she's here to celebrate Mother's Day with us. She's here every time I get discouraged and sure that I shouldn't waste my time writing to encourage me and tell me I can do it.

My mom...she's my hero. Her strength and positive attitude are things that I hope I inherited from her.

Thank you, Mom, for all you've done and all you continue to do. Your love and acceptance and faith in me mean so much more than you'll ever know.

Happy Mother's Day.

I'm Not Crazy (I'm Just a Little Unwell)

Okay, don't you think it's about time I got off my slacker butt and did some honest to goodness blogging? I mean, I flake two weeks in a row on my Wanderlust Wednesdays, and I finished Don't Look Down two weeks ago and haven't written a review for it. Just what is my problem?

The problem, you see, is that my main character and her male lead won't cooperate with me. They want to get all willy nilly with my plot, preferring to argue with each other rather than make nice. Or vice versa. It seems whatever I have planned, they have to do the exact opposite. And frankly, it's driving me insane.

I would just love to throw these two in a room together and lock the door. Tell them they can't come out until they've agreed to cooperate with my wishes. The only problem is, they're fictional figments of my imagination.

Argh!

This is the very trait that gives outsiders the impression that we're insane. We hear voices and argue with them. We get angry and frustrated when these imaginary people won't do as they're told. "Well, they're your characters, why don't you just make them do it?" people ask. And to them, I say, "HA!"

No, make that "HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!"

If only they knew, right? If only they knew.

I'm at my wit's end here. I should have finished this novel months ago, but still it drags on. All because Mari and Zander would rather fight like a couple of blue-haired old women in the beauty salon than kiss and make up. So, what do you do when your characters go rogue on you? When they just. Won't. Do. As. They're. Told?

PS: Sorry if I got Matchbox Twenty stuck in your head with my title. Could be worse, right?

Drivel. Nothing But Drivel.

AHH!

So it's Wednesday, which in theory, means I should be writing about some wonderful, gorgeous place far, far away from here. Sadly, I have nothing prepared. And after neglecting the ONLY weekly blog post I've vowed to do last week, I'm flaking again. Not one week, but two! Oh, I fail. I feel really guilty about that. Next week, I'll write a double post, featuring two of my most favorite places. I promise!

BUT!

I've written nearly 10k more on the never-ending novel. And I'm making real, actual progress. Like, I'm on page fifteen of my twenty page outline. Progress. Even though I've just surpassed 90k and am pretty sure I won't be finished at 100k.

I'm telling you, this book will. Never. End. Ever.

I don't really have anything to write about tonight. I'm watching American Idol and hoping that Big Mike gets voted off and bouncing back and forth between writing a dirty, naughty scene in my book and writing this.

American Idol has made me mad this year. I hate it when they split the top whatever evenly between guys and girls. This year, there were so many amazing girls that didn't even get a chance because they did this. Instead, we got stuck with a bunch of mediocre guys (including Big Mike -- Mr. Overrated) and the talented people are dropping like flies. America doesn't vote for talent anymore -- it's a popularity contest. Sadly.

Anyway, I'm gonna glue myself to Microsoft Word for the next hour or so and finish the scene that makes me blush. I'm sorry I didn't have anything interesting to write about!

PS. I got bored with my old layout, so I switched it up again. I think I have a touch of ADHD when it comes to layouts!