Tipping the Scale

Three days into October and I still haven't decided. I can't seem to make up my mind. I've got one foot planted firmly on each side of the fence. It starts in less than a month. I should be planning already.

If you're lost, I'm talking about NaNoWriMo. I'm torn right down the middle about whether or not I will participate this year. The last two years were easy decisions. Of course I'd do it. Why wouldn't I? It's the best thing since sliced bread! Or the Internet. Or whatever super awesome thing you couldn't live without.

This year, though...oh, boy. I've got a full plate. And so I've resorted to making a Pros and Cons list. Here goes nothing:

Pros:
1. I'd have a ton of words on a new project to work with when Projects One and Two are finished.

2. 50k in 30 days is fantastic practice at just letting go and writing. And isn't that practice we all need?

3. The sense of community from fellow NaNo-ers is unbelievable. Writers, in general, are an amazing group of people. But NaNo-ers? SO great!

4. I'd get a free proof copy for completing the 50k. And, let's face it, holding a hard copy of your book in your hands is one heck of a motivator.

5. Well, NaNo is just FUN.

Cons:

1. I've got a full course load, including a math class I HAVE to pass. And math and I don't get along, so it'll take extra work.

2. I'm also working between 20 and 30 hours a week.

3. I've got a lack of fresh ideas. There are a couple old ones I can dig up and brush off, though.

4. Preparation for the winter holidays. Baking for Thanksgiving, Christmas shopping -- Black Friday, in particular -- random holiday parties that may crop up.

5. Two projects are in various stages of revisions. Shouldn't I work on one of those instead?

Oh, and I'm not putting this one in the Cons list because I'm so darn excited about it that it could never be a Con, but I've also got the LeAnn Rimes concert in mid-November, which will involve driving two hours to Detroit then staying overnight.

So, there you have it. My Pros and Cons list. Neck and neck. Of course. And, here, I thought it would help!

What do you think? Do either of these lists outweigh the other in terms of importance? Am I just over thinking it? Would YOU participate if you were me?

Blah, Mondays...and an Award!

Ugh. Monday. I woke up this morning with a head cold from Hades. The way I'm feeling is in sharp contrast to the beautiful day we're having. The sun is out, there's a nice breeze (read: spring breeze -- the blow-you-over kind) and the birds are chirping. Ahh, the irony.

I suppose it fits, though. My mood is foul. I have to work today. Three to close, which is 1am, or whenever we wrap up the cleaning duties. I loathe ten hour days, but they allow me to get my hours in and have that lovely third day off, so who am I to complain?

Anyway, I was cheered up when I found out that Julie over at Silver Lining gave me an award today. Thanks, Julie! You're a sweetheart!

In the time-honored tradition of blog awards, I will pass it on to a few of the loverly ladies in the blogging world:

1. Roni at Fiction Groupie -- Who, by the way, also passed on an award to her fellow writer/bloggers
2. E. Elle at The Writer's Funhouse
3. Alexandra at The Publication Follies of Alexandra Shostak
4. Frankie at Frankie Writes
5. OfficeGirl at Tired But Writing...

I have to leave for work in less than an hour and, considering I got zero words written over the weekend, I better make the most of my time! Hope everyone has a great Monday!

Dear Novel, I Hate You.

Aright, so I finished my outline about three days ago. After a couple days of reworking the dates (which is very important with a pregnant main character) I thought I was ready to get back to work on the novel. My poor novel hasn't been touched in months. When I opened that document, I had no idea where I was even at. I had to scroll up and read the entire last chapter just to get my head back into the story. And then, believing I was prepared to write, I put my fingers on my keyboard and...nothing. I don't know what's going on in my brain, but it's not too keen on creativity right now. As I stared at my screen, it occurred to me:

I.

Hate.

My.

Novel.


Okay, not really. Somewhere deep, deep...deep inside, I'm sure I still love my novel. I love the characters, the story, the basic idea. But I've stressed so much about finishing this thing ever since November ended that, well, my enthusiasm for the project has died a tragic death.

I believe we should start a support group for people going through this very same thing. The "I Hate My Novel Support Group." I am sure I'm not the only one that goes through this. I'm also sure that non-writers don't get it. I was talking to Dana about it last night, and she said, "I have no idea what you're talking about."

So is the life of a writer.

The voices you hear in your head that you're afraid to mention for fear of others questioning your sanity. The proclamations of hatred for something you slave over for months, even years, only to have people ask you why you bother, if you hate it so much. The lack of understanding for the frenzied and, well, crazy manner with which you attack your computer screen or notebook when the muse has deigned to show up. The deep, dark fits of depression when the writing isn't going just as planned, the extreme, almost manic happiness when the words flow like wine. This is why it is important to have writer friends, whether they're in real life or strictly online. Without them, you feel outcasted and crazy. And, let's face it, we writers are crazy enough on our own, without the opinions of outsiders condemning us as such.

Anyway, I've gone off track. My novel. I hate it. Whenever I think of working on it, I get angry and frustrated and literally want to run away. This is no good, considering I want to finish it by April 1st. So, here's my question to all you writers out there: How do you get through this stage of noveling? Prefferably without tossing the entire thing out the window?